I love that little ding my phone makes when I’m getting a text. I feel important, loved, and excited to see what the messager will have to say. But mostly, it’s the relief that I have been granted a response. I don’t know why I torture myself by sending texts–it’s almost always a bad idea, because even though I tell myself I won’t, I put my phone right next to me and wait, wait, wait, for the person to acknowledge me. When they don’t within 3-5 minutes, I start imagining all the things they might be doing, trying to convince myself that they are not ignoring me, and that I shouldn’t have texter’s remorse.
Each of my friends has their own texting styles, and I’ve come to understand who will respond when and how. My friend A is the most considerate, and always returns messages promptly and in detail. M might take all day, and doesn’t like to leave the last message–when she’s done, she’s done. My boss, E, uses all sorts of abbreviations; it took me a while to figure out LMAO, especially because I didn’t feel that the subject was a laughing matter.
And then there is J. I love him beyond X’s, O’s, and “I heart you’s” but he drives me crazy with his delayed one-word answers to pressing questions, such as “what’s going on for tonight?”, “Do you want me to pick up beer on my way there?”, and “Do you think you’ll be done with work soon?” His sister has complained that he does the same thing to her, so I know I can’t take it personally, but I would love to be sent a random “thinking of you” type message every once in awhile. I should be fair–he will do this at 3am, when I’m sleeping, and he’s drunk. And being the silly girl that I am, I get all smiley when he does.
And so, I only text J when absolutely necessary or when I am in an emotional state that can handle not receiving an answer. This probably makes me seem like an unfeeling girlfriend, but it’s only for self-preservation that I do it.
Despite the anxiety it causes, I love texting because I hate things such as eye-contact, confrontation, leaving voicemails, and awkward pauses over the phone. It allows the anti-social to be social, and gives one the ability to edit herself before she speaks, which is a very, very good thing.
